Since this is a massive update, I'm elevating the version number to 4.0!

The downside is that of course there are now loads more bugs for you all to find. Go ahead and start reporting! I imagine there'll need to be a hotfix tomorrow evening.

As is the norm at the moment, here is a mega mirror: https://mega.co.nz/#!ulE2mBpa!rWJKEGbAUlZVe-xKAg_DSdO-GHpjNcxOtNmlA2Z2usU

• Fixed bug where the pink wardrobe disappears after fainting!
• Fixed a bug where standard accessories could be cursed, and the only way to remove them was to pay with them!
• Fixed a bug where semen, urine and milk fluid types got reset to "nothing right now" upon fainting.
• Fixed a bug where drinks containers always disappeared upon fainting, even if in the pink wardrobe / location of the player.
• Fixed bug where squirting 1 unit of semen into a vessel caused nothing to appear.
• Fixed a P5 bug caused by presenting your breasts to a monster.
• Fixed a bug where unique shop items (e.g. the maternity dress) were vastly overpriced.
• Fixed a bug where the yes and no responses to "do you want to resist?" when getting fucked and milked on the bench at the same time did the wrong thing.
• Fixed a bug where the sex addiction and semen addiction of the player were set to 1/3 of each other instead of 2/3.
• Did some more fixes to the "clean" verb, hopefully it'll be more co-operative now.
• Fixed a bug where the game prevented the latex hood from being worn.
• Time no longer progresses for several rounds after the lake monster scene.
• Fixed a couple of bugs where events that were supposed to reduce sex addiction (e.g. defeating an enemy with a whip of domination) were reducing semen addiction instead.
• Fixed a bug where individual monsters could only get the player pregnant once each.
• 'Pull vines' now works as well as the existing 'Attack vines' and 'Pull vine'.
• All living things (most notably vines) will now reliably remove virginity.
• Finally worked out why the game sometimes chooses the royal guard flavour over others when it's not a royal guard monster you're interacting with! If you notice this happening, report the bug and I will finally be able to fix this.
• Lubricant no longer lowers the chance of openness increases.
• Fixed a gape bug - paddles and other elements that can increase orifice soreness without actually going inside can no longer increase openness.
• Your thighs only get coated in semen if bukkake fetish is enabled, otherwise it just flows directly to the floor. NB sometimes the in-game flavour still might only mention that it trickles to your thighs. All the change is doing is ensuring that with bukkake fetish off, no semen sticks to your person, it all runs off immediately.
• The slipperiness of liquid on the floors of rooms has been made a bit more meaningful. It used to max out pretty quickly (at 10 units of liquid); instead it now maxes out at 40, but the impact of any single unit of liquid has been halved. So with small amounts of liquid there is less of a punishment, but rooms absolutely coated in fluids are much more difficult to walk in.
• Washing in a body of water now correctly cleans your belly (the outside, not the inside) of semen. You can now clean your belly with the clean command.
• Fixed a bug where humiliation increased by a minimum of 10 every single turn!
  • Also fixed a bug where humiliation wasn't decaying each turn as intended.
• You can no longer bless the squirt dildo, only uncurse it. You naughty munchkins.
• You can now clean individual items of clothing that you're not wearing in bodies of water.
• You are now warned when you try and crawl into a room you can see has pink smoke in it, or rest on furniture in a room that has pink smoke in it.
• A bug where only cotton stockings were appearing has been fixed.
• The standing function was old and outdated, it has been rewritten to better work with modern weight mechanics. You can no longer faint from being too heavy and failing to stand, you must decide to do it manually.
• You can no longer automatically faint from being too heavy and trying to crawl, you must decide to faint manually.
• The 'fuck' skill is significantly easier to learn assuming you ask the right question. You cannot learn the skill successfully if your sex-addiction is too high (over 12).
• Heel modular code treatment (plus a few improvements)
  • Random spread of heel heights is no longer mostly 2 inches and no 1 inches but instead a normal distribution around 3 inches (minimum 1 inches, maximum 5 inches, with platform and wedge heels being slightly larger).
  • Item name now includes "pair of" at the start.
  • All heels except 1 inch heels are now 1 level more difficult to walk in with heel skill 0.
  • Situations that make you walk more slowly (i.e. diapers, hobble skirts, ankle bondage, large hips, butt plugs) have been made fully distinct from situations that might make you fall over (i.e. heels, slippery floor, super long hair, belt of sturdiness).
    • Things that can make you fall over are checked every time you move. NB. this means you can now fall over from a slippery room even when not wearing heels.
    • This standard tripping chance no longer checks against dexterity, unless it is a monster or trap that is trying to make you fall over.
    • Things that slow you significantly reduce the likelihood of you escaping from a monster by trying to walk away, but no longer affect your chance of falling over.
    • In a turn when you walk away from an unfriendly monster, the game first checks if you are too slow, and then checks if you fall over.
    • It is now possible (but quite unlikely) that you could have a 0% or near 0% chance of walking fast enough to avoid the monster blocking your movement, if for example you have a hobble skirt and a full diaper and a low dexterity score. This is more realistic but I have yet to see if I am happy with its impact on fun gameplay.
• Panties modular code treatment (plus a few improvements)
  • Descriptions now tell you how much the underwear is successfully concealing your butt cheeks (no effect on gameplay yet).
  • Penis and orifice description now tells you if the underwear is successfully concealing them.
  • Large penises now count as exposed if they don't fit inside the underwear.
  • Examining the underwear will also usually let you know if your penis is visible.
  • Lewd writing on the underwear now appears in player description summary of clothes.
  • Lewd writing magic effects no longer restricted to when they are worn. Instead, most now either constantly affect a stat, or periodically change a stat.
  • Undies with lewd writing now have different outrage levels to those without.
• Spent a lot of time trying to make sure that the player's self examine description is more well organised and less repetitive. But there's still a lot to do here.
• Fuck skill can now be used on aeromancer (see blog post)
• The aeromancer now is only aggressive if you have your nipples or crotch exposed (or have a high bimbo score). She still has no friendly interaction with the player.
• Slimegirl now added (see blog post). NB she currently does not disappear from your belly upon fainting.
• Quality of life improvement with monster movements, when you issue a "go" command, monsters will now move before the room description is displayed, so the "you can see X monsters here" is actually accurate. There should be no other gameplay impact to this change.
• The description of your own breasts now includes a more accurate description of how heavy they are, and also lets you know if they are currently on display.
• Removed a feature that reduced the maximum your belly could hold when pregnant. This was frustrating for pregnant players as you could often faint from belly overflow when anally creampied whilst waiting to give birth and it didn't add anything meaningful or fun to the gameplay.
• Added an experimental feature to reward pacifists who use strength as their dump stat. If the first time an enemy becomes aggressive, you successfully run away (not to the royal chambers) until they lose the will to chase you, a tracking variable is increased. Every three monsters you escape from in this way (remember, it only counts the first time you encounter each monster), you gain a bonus point in dexterity or intelligence, whichever is lower. This variable does not reset upon fainting, but some monsters may count as having been encountered in your previous lives.
• Players with near maximum sex addiction can always successfully steel through orifice soreness in exchange for further intelligence loss. Furthermore, you can never lose your last point in intelligence through this choice, or through orgasms. Instead you stay at 1 intelligence, fucking and sucking to your heart's content, until the next external source causes you to permanently lose intelligence. Then, the next orgasm triggers the brainless bimbo game over unless you can find a way to increase your intelligence permanently before it. This should give slightly more viability to a carefully planned "fuck almost everything" strategy.
• Added a new status line which does away with the compass to make more space, since most people use the map now. The top line is left completely free for super long titles, and the extra space is used to add a "sexuality" tracker which summarises your feelings towards sex (well, the kind of sex the game is trying to throw your way anyway). You can switch back to the old one in the settings if you prefer.
• Royal guards can now take several turns to receive a blowjob
  • Submitting increases humiliation but resisting only has a 50% chance of getting the guard closer to finishing, so can take a lot longer.
  • The game flavour should make it obvious when the guard is going to climax next round.
  • Submitting in the final round of the blowjob results in a deepthroat cumshot. Can trigger gagging and puking if you don't have the right skill, and increases semen addiction.
  • Resisting in the final round makes him cum normally in your mouth and order you to swallow.
    • If you swallow, you increase humiliation and semen addiction.
    • If you spit, he punishes you by destroying a random worn item of clothing (but I guess if you play this really cleverly by removing everything you like, you could get rid of something you don't here. You clever slut.)
    • If bukkake fetish is enabled, there's a decent chance of instead receiving a facial, which can be dodged with dexterity. However a successful dodge results in the same punishment as above.
• So, lots of new flavour text from MG:
  • Guard blowjob scenes
  • Aeromancer fuck scenes
  • Small bits for shopkeeper and gladiator
• Also a bit of flavour for the demoness from Kat, a new contributor.